Resourcing the Revolution

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The Rebel Yogi Origin Story – Part 3

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Back in April, a friend and fellow yogi requested that I do a more in-depth exploration of the “receiving the call” piece of the origin story. I’ve been mulling it over for long enough now that I think I finally have a proper response. The particular line from part 2 of this story follows:

That summer was a life changer. I went from armchair activist, signing e-petitions and not much else, to full out environmental activist. I was entrenched in the fight, had skin in the game, and was ready to take on the world. I had received the call loud and clear, and I knew that one of the reasons that I had been put on this earth was to save it.”

There are quite a few stories out there that involve the person who receives their call having a voice speak to them from above, some physical manifestation, or something a bit more obvious. To be honest, mine wasn’t quite like that.

My personal version of hearing the call was more of a certainty, an inner voice – that moment where there was no more hesitation or fear around the action that I needed to take, just the knowledge of what I had to do.

My certainty came with the words of one James Hansen, quoted by Bill McKibben in an email that went out to the 350.org mailing list. When one of the nation’s top climate scientists says that mining and burning a particular form of fossil fuel energy is essentially “game over” for the climate, it tends to get your attention. For me, it certainly did. I stepped up and became more involved in the fight than I had expected to – risking arrest, laying my body on the front lines, stepping up and saying loud and clear that if the fossil fuel companies wanted to wreck my planet, they would have to go through me to do it.

I tried to find the original post on the Tar Sands Action website, but things have been dismantled a bit since they joined up officially with 350. I did manage to find a post at another blog that has the full text of the email that changed everything.

So what does this have to do with you?

You’re a world changer. You wouldn’t be here reading this if you weren’t. But maybe you haven’t quite figured out exactly what it is that you are meant to do. Maybe you’re wondering if you’ve “received your call” but somehow missed it in passing; maybe you’ve been dabbling here and there, or throwing yourself full force into something you think might be “it” but you’re just not 100 percent sure.

My take is that if you have to wonder if you’ve found “it”… you haven’t.

It doesn’t mean you won’t. In fact, I’m sure that you will. But it’s like most things, in that it’s worth the wait, and it works a whole lot better if you don’t force it. If you find yourself in that not being quite sure camp, keep exploring! The exploration can be incredibly fulfilling, and worst case, you’ll figure out what “it” isn’t – which brings you one step closer to what is. And the closer you get, the more certainty will come with the path.

It took me quite some time and a lot of twisting and turning along my path to find environmentalism as a cause, and even more time to figure out that I had Rebel Yogi in my future. Do I consider any of the time or effort that I put in to getting here a waste? Absolutely not. Everything that I did, each organization that I worked with or cause that I championed, each step led me one step closer to where I am today.

So enjoy the exploration, savor the journey while you’re a part of it, and when your own “it” comes along, you’ll know.

—

Michael Margolis wrote a post recently about origin stories that provided the inspiration for this series of posts. This is part 3 – here are part 1 and part 2.

Confessions of a Wannabe World Changer – Part 2

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It’s confession time. Again.

If you recall from my original confessions post, one of the key tenets of Rebel Yogi is this: you, fellow change maker, are just as important as the work that you are doing.

I came back from the Ashram feeling so good – better than I had in recent memory – and I guess I thought that I could just charge full speed ahead again. Finishing up with teacher training meant that I had the foundation built for moving forward, and I could get back to normal.

What I forgot is that my “normal” no longer is. Add on to that, I forgot to do my own work.

And this week, my body has been reminding me of that fact. It started small: not eating quite as well as I could, not getting to bed at a reasonable hour, letting the stress of this new project start to build up, not keeping up with my physical yoga practice. The pushback started small, too. An ache here, a little bit of sluggishness in the mornings; nothing I couldn’t push through.

Now let’s stop for a moment. See what I did there? I was noticing the fact that my body was giving me signs, but I decided to ignore them, to push through. I feel like I should know better by now, but it’s just a good reminder that we’re all constantly walking this path. Sometimes we stumble along the way. Rather than letting those stumbles take us off the path, we have the opportunity to stop and pause, to reset, and to move forward again with a renewed sense of who we are and why we’re doing this – to champion our selves as we do our world changing work.

I had intended to post up something else today, but it felt like I needed to come clean and be honest about what’s going on behind the scenes. I hadn’t intended for the “Confessions” post to turn into a series, but here we are! We’ll be back to regularly scheduled programming next week. This week is all about recharging, reflecting on how to move forward, and really committing to taking care of myself along the way.

I hope that my stumbles can help serve as a reminder for everyone out there to take some time this week to do the same.

Caring Sucks: Why We Shouldn’t Do It

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Yeah, you heard that right. I know what you might be thinking: she’s gone over the edge, lost it, let go of her grip on reality. But, do me a favor and stick with me.

You might not have paid attention, but there’s a definition of the word “care” in the dictionary that frightens me. To care brings us worry, anxiety, trouble, concern, stress, pressure, strain; sorrow, woe, hardship…

Let that sink in a minute.

We “care” deeply about our family and friends. We “care” deeply about our causes, the work that we are doing in the world. There’s usually a laundry list of people and things that we “care” about – did you ever imagine that you could be causing yourself harm by caring?

To go a little bit deeper into what I mean, I’m not asking you to actually stop caring. It’s just that there’s a dark underbelly to the way that we world-changers tend to go about things. When we care about something so deeply that it brings overwhelming stress and anxiety into our lives, maybe it’s time to take a step back, take a deep breath, and reexamine what we’re really trying to accomplish.

Yes, the things that you are working on are important, perhaps even life-altering. (We are world-changers, after all.) That being said, is your work more important than you?

Stop.

I know the answer that just went through your head, because it’s the same answer that I came up with as well. Take a second to think about it, though – to really think. Examine the question, and then reframe: what would be lost to the cause if you were no longer around to champion it? Imagine the world, minus the world-changers. How much more of an impact could you have if you brought a whole, happy and healthy you into the game?

Now, I want you to answer that question again: is your work more important than you?

I have a theory that we can actually increase our impact by taking a step back to care for ourselves. If one out of every 50 people is doing world-changing work, but going about it in an unsustainable way, burning out, eating poorly, getting sick often, always stressed… what kind of impression does that make to the other 49 people looking in at that person?

What if that person were to take a step back and take care of themselves, going about the same work with enthusiasm, a peaceful demeanor, good health and a positive outlook? My bet is that far more of those 49 onlookers would be willing to give that lifestyle a try versus the alternative example.

So here’s my challenge to you: quit caring. At least quit the kind of caring that makes you fifteen different kinds of stressed, and replace it with the kind of caring that allows you to provide what is necessary for your health and happiness as you go about making a difference in the world.

This is the basis of what I’m looking to bring into the world with Rebel Yogi – the good kind of caring. Do you have thoughts, comments, counter points? Let’s discuss!

Confessions of a Wannabe World Changer

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It’s confession time.

First, that post I promised you last week, the second piece of the origin story? It’s coming next week.

But most important, one of the key tenets of Rebel Yogi is this: you, fellow change maker, are just as important as the work that you are doing.

That means it’s important to take time to take care of yourself – getting enough sleep, eating a healthy diet at consistent times, getting out and moving your body, taking space for yourself – among other things.

At the time I wrote this post:

  • I had gone to yoga twice in the previous two weeks; two classes in two days, and then nothing for 10 days.
  • I spent an entire day hunched in front of my computer, stressing about getting things done, all knotted up inside, to the point that my stomach hurt from the tension.
  • I sat down one morning to finish up a few details for getting a blog post out, and forgot to eat until it was almost 4 pm.

Some might say that I’m doing a terrible job at doing my own work, practicing what I preach – however you say it, I’ve been negligent to myself. I’ve fallen right back into old patterns without even realizing it.

But, one of the reasons that I’m bringing this to light and sharing with you today, is that this is a journey. I’m giving myself a pass, acknowledging that I’ve stumbled, and knowing that the reminder is good for me. One stumble does not a total failure make. The times that we trip over ourselves just happen – we’re human. The key is forgiveness, and the commitment to pick yourself back up and set yourself back on the right track.

Stumble, fall, get back up. Repeat. The rockiest paths often bring us to the most stunning views.

And, the yoga class that I did after ten days of nothing? It felt so good.

I’m leaving for the Ashram in just under a week and a half, and I have spent way too much time freaking out about how much I have to do before I leave. I’m living in the future, worrying about something that has yet to happen, sending my body all these messages that give it permission to knot up and get out of balance.

Another confession: the phrase “OMG I’m leaving in two and a half weeks” left my lips a solid 25 times during one particular day last week, much to the chagrin of everyone listening.

I think the key is admitting that we’ve stumbled, taking a moment to learn whatever we can from the moment: what set of circumstances set us up for the stumble, how can we avoid the same situation next time, how we can more delicately tread a similar path moving forward, or even just how to recover a with a little bit more grace.

For me, this means acknowledging that launching a new venture is going to be more stressful than my past few months have been, and will involve more time spent actively working.

I’m learning how to be me, and how to move forward, learning new healthy patterns and ways of doing things. It’s not going to be easy, but with a new outlook on how I balance along the path, it’s shaping up to be a much more stunning journey.

For the time I have between now and flying east, I’m making myself a promise – I’m going to move easily through the planning and preparation, scheduling out time for yoga (aiming for 4 classes per week), making sure that I get enough sleep, taking time to eat, and prioritizing snuggles with my puppy.

Because, really – there’s nothing more important than us, no moment more important than now. Our work and our future all branch out from this moment, so we might as well enjoy it while it’s here.

The Rebel Yogi Origin Story – Part 1

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“In the event of an emergency, secure your own mask before assisting others.”

If you’ve ever been on board an airplane, you’ve heard the spiel before. It’s standard to the safety speech, but have you ever really taken the time to think about what they’re talking about, or realized how right they are? If the plane is crashing and the cabin depressurizes, you can’t do a single thing to help your fellow passengers if you’re suffocating from lack of oxygen.

Maybe the example is a bit dramatic, but it paints a very vivid picture. So why do we think that the same thing doesn’t apply in real life? Why, when it comes to our lives, do we think we can ignore the safety speech?

For most of my life, I’ve been an overachiever, an entrepreneurial spirit, and I thought that I could burn the candle at both ends without consequences. Anything that I put my mind to, I accomplished; I held the mantra “I’ll sleep when I’m dead” close to heart. Burning brightly, I threw 110% of myself into my passions, and I fought fiercely for the things that I believed in.

I ignored the safety speech for way too long, and it could have cost me everything.

In fact, I ignored it until the day I got the call from the doctor’s office. That sentence that you don’t really want to hear from anyone, much less your doctor – “we need to see you tomorrow” – when the doctor skips lunch so that they can fit in your appointment. That moment where routine yearly blood work turns up a chronic genetic condition that changes everything.

(A quick side note to my insurance company, if you’re sneaking around reading my blog posts – this doesn’t mean you should jack up my insurance premium. In fact, you should lower it. The diagnosis just means that I’m going to be a lot healthier moving forward than I would have been before I had my full health picture. K, thanks. Now, back to regularly scheduled programming.)

There were a couple of paths that my brain went down after this phone call, full speed with no brakes. The worst-case scenarios, you know the ones… they took over for a while. Then, the second thing that happened is that my priorities became crystal clear. Family, and the fact that my parents were an entire continent away.

My business coach has been using free writing as a tool for me to gain clarity around my purpose, and I’m going to share some of the thoughts that came out of the writing session that took place the week after said doctor’s appointment:

The thought pattern of how to find a peaceful balance – how do I move forward from here? How do I create a meaningful, powerful and revolutionary life in a balanced, peaceful way? How do I save myself as I try to (and still want to) save the world?

I find that I am back to the discomfort surrounding “I don’t know” because now I truly do not know how I am moving forward. I know that the prime directive is self-care and taking care of my family. Beyond that, the great unknown lingers.

In some ways, I experienced a great wave of relief – here was a bright, flashing sign to slow down, to reevaluate. This wasn’t me giving up or chickening out – this was my body, my doctor, saying “stop”.  No more high stress situations, more yoga and meditation. More healthy eating and lots of work on system balancing.

In all my talk of broken systems, it comes down that my body is the broken system that I need to work with first. Do your own work – in the most head-smackingly personal and direct way possible.

Even with the knowledge of what my diagnosis could mean, I have felt strangely calm since last week. Maybe I’m still in shock, or maybe I have a deep realization that freaking out about what is going on will do absolutely nothing positive, and has the potential to cause some real harm.

Whatever the reason, I am thankful for my ability to transcend the mess and put one foot in front of the other. For now, that means following my doctor’s orders, and starting to evaluate what goes and what can stay.

I feel like I already shed so much in coming here to Portland, but perhaps the things that I shed were just skin-deep – maybe now it is time to dig down to the roots and find my spiritual, structural detoxification.

From these roots, Rebel Yogi began to really take shape. For most of my world changing life, I had come at the problems facing our world from the stance of an activist: fighting. I tried to frame it as what we were “fighting for” as opposed to what we were “fighting against” to keep things positive, but it was still fighting.

One of the literal definitions of the word fight means “to oppose action”, another means “to move forward with difficulty”. We’re not exactly setting ourselves up for success if we think about it that way.

So why do we spend so much time mired in the fight, throwing ourselves valiantly into the flames? Faced with the knowledge that I could not continue to approach life in such a way, I was forced to stop and look for a different way of doing things. I had no other choice.

I don’t have all the answers, and that’s what Rebel Yogi is about – walking this path together, figuring it out as we go. I’m sure we’ll stumble and make some mistakes along the way, but if we’re going about things with the right motivation – caring for ourselves and finding that place of balance before reaching out into the world – securing our own masks before assisting others – I know that we can change the world for the better.

—

For more of the story, here’s part 2 and part 3!

If you’re here from the Boost Blog Traffic SBO Best Posts of 2014 list, thanks so much for reading! Be sure to sign up for the email list so you can get your free yoga nidra session!

Michael Margolis wrote a post about origin stories that provided the inspiration for this week’s post. 

How to Save the World Without Burning Out

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A grand adventure starts in just under four weeks.

Three weeks and four days, to be exact. Not that I’m counting.

On Sunday, April 13th I will start my basic yoga teacher training at Satchidananda Ashram-Yogaville in Buckingham, VA. This training will be one of the first major steps along the path to bringing Rebel Yogi to life. This has been a project a lifetime in the making, and I wanted to give you, my earliest readers, an idea of what’s to come.

For the next few weeks, I will be writing here, sharing the origin story of Rebel Yogi – a peek behind the curtain, to where and how it all began. This story is only in the opening chapters, and the journey will be curated, laid open for all to see, to share and to join in the expedition.

During my time at the Ashram, I will do my best to share a weekly update here on the blog and any small daily musings on social media; that being said, the schedule is incredibly full, and time will tell how much “free time” I will actually have to sit and write! Don’t worry – anything that I don’t post up during that month will see the light as I’m able.

My daily schedule from April 13 until May 11:

AM
6:00 Meditation
7:00 Hatha Yoga
8:30 Breakfast
9:30-11:30 Morning Program (in classroom)
PM
12-12:30 Meditation at LOTUS shrine
12:45 Lunch
1:30-2:00 Free time
2:00-3:00 Study
3:00-6:00 Afternoon Program (in classroom)
6:00-6:30 Meditation or restorative yoga
6:30 Dinner
7:30-9:00 Evening Program (in classroom)
10:00 Lights out – Silence until after morning Hatha Yoga class

The eventual goal for the Rebel Yogi community is to reach out into the world, empowering thousands of world changers to improve their lives through yoga, while also creating a sustainable life balance as they make their lasting mark on the world – basically, learning how we can save the world without burning out in the process.

I’ve watched too many friends and colleagues burn fast and bright, only to flame out young, drained and unable to continue their amazing, world changing work – something has to give!

One step, one foot in front of the other – I’m glad that you’re along for the journey. Let’s get to work, fellow change maker!